Hello everyone! This is a one-time blog post. I will never be able to write this blog post again. I submitted my dissertation on Monday the 26th of April 2022. I guess you could say I’ve almost graduated. I wanted to share this experience with you all in this week’s blog post. You guys are a part of all the milestones that happen in my life. It feels amazing to write this blog post knowing my dissertation is complete and hopefully the best work I have ever done.
I mean, I feel as though it’s the best work I’ve ever done (so far). I hope to excel beyond anything I can ever imagine in my career. A few people said to me that this was a wonderful start to my career. That is a crazy thought, that my dissertation will contribute to my career. I really think I made the most of the dissertation opportunity. I felt as though I wrote about something incredibly meaningful with real passion and purpose. I hope it can inform further research. I hope it can inform my future research! Can you believe how wonderful life is? What a dream that would be.
Jacob being the beautiful human that he is, came along and got some lovely pictures of this wonderful moment. He always manages to capture moments in the most amazing ways. I can’t wait to look back in twenty years and remember this moment.
Something I want to talk about that I feel no one does, is that I didn’t feel that great on the day. Once I had submitted it, the whole day I was filled with anxiety. I checked that I had submitted it about one hundred times, and I kept thinking of any small mistakes I had made. Majority of the day was filled with ‘what ifs’. Which didn’t feel great at all. I was thinking about any negative feedback I had received or overthinking conversations about my dissertation. I suppose that’s a natural response. I guess that shows how much I cared about the work that I did.
Now, a few days after submitting, I feel better as now I can’t do any more. It’s gone. I am surrendering to the process of life and what will be will be (check out this week’s podcast, linked at the end). I hope that it is amazing. When you work so hard for something I guess it’s natural to doubt it and feel worried about the outcome.
I worked on this dissertation solidly for 10 months and planning etc for over a year. That is a long time! That is a lot of time and effort placed on something to just let go of. I wish more people would discuss the feeling of submitting your dissertation and graduating. I feel as though it’s a bit scary and incredibly nerve racking.
I must admit it did feel good taking all those pictures and feeling the realisation that I no longer had this massive looming deadline.
Another thing that people do not talk about is the lack of motivation afterwards. I don’t think it has been that bad for me. However, I’ve been feeling that I just want a day off to do absolutely nothing and do whatever I feel like doing. I just don’t have time to do that. I have two more assessments to do, and they aren’t far away. I feel as though I can’t take any time off, guilt-free anyway. That is a bit rubbish especially after working so long on something. All my other work feels unmeaningful now. That might be a negative thing to say, but I shouldn’t invalidate my feelings. I know it is critically important, I must remind myself of this.
Have you submitted your dissertation or know someone that has? How did it feel for you/them?
Thank you for coming along on my unfiltered journey through life. I always want to share the most real version of myself and my experiences.
Everyone pray for me while I wait for my results. Now that’s going to be a scary day and hopefully, a very happy one.
Thank you very much for reading.
Listen to this if you are feeling anxious:
P.S. I have some VERY exciting news coming soon. Follow my blog and my journey, I update you guys on everything. You can get in contact with me through the contact page. Like, share and comment!
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As always, love,